Wednesday, January 25, 2012

What Your Favorite Blog Says About You


Gawker :  You tell your friends jokes about their ethnicities and sexual orientations. They grin and say "Bitch!" and pretend to smack you.
Huffington Post :  Most of your pleasures are guilty pleasures.
Daily Kos :  You own a "Disappearing Civil Liberties" mug.
Laughing Squid :  You own an unconventional bicycle.
BuzzFeed :  Your giggle is too high-pitched.
Gizmodo :  You correct people in conversations that you overhear in public.
Lifehacker : You know where your pens are.
Kotaku :  Your girlfriend says, "At least when you read a book, you come away having learned something."
Mashable :  Your Facebook feed is all "likes" of news articles you've read.
TechCrunch :  You "network".
Jezebel :  You convinced your mom to leave your dad, and she's never been happier.
The Awl :  You aren't snotty about keeping books in good condition, you acknowledge that dogears and scribbled notes are healthy, but you have a few special editions you'd only lend out to a very close friend.
Deadspin :  You're going to kickpunch the next asshole who says "I only watch it for the commercials" as if this is some mark of intelligence.
Boing Boing :  You've voted for a satirical political candidate.
[EXPANDED version since Boing Boing linked to us : Boing Boing: You are someone's favorite uncle who taught them how to build their own toys. You are someone's "cool" aunt who sends the amazing Birthday gifts from far-off lands. You know swear words in fifteen languages. You have built seven completely different and contest-winning party costumes around a single vintage fez.]
Kottke.org :  You read all the liner notes, even if you bought the album as mp3s.
Daring Fireball :  You know three ways to tell Helvetica from Arial.
The Hairpin :  You got Maira Kalman to draw a cartoon in your book at a reading.
[EXPANSION cause The Hairpin linked us ! The Hairpin:  You get the importance of hand towels. A lot of other shit in your life is out of control, but you are not gonna make anyone visit your home and dry their hands on your bath towel, like a peasant. You have an uncanny ability to guess the correct time of day within a five-minute range. It's a shame "spunky" is such a gross little word because it used to be a good one and it would be helpful right now.]
Think Progress :  You can communicate multiple levels of disgust with your snorts.
Perez Hilton :  You were bullied in high school.
The Gloss : You have a purse dog.
PopSugar : You feel comforted by laughtracks.
Neatorama : You've bought food from ThinkGeek.
Serious Eats :  You've debated about Five Guys vs. In 'n' Out.
TreeHugger :  You feel bad about how long you take in the shower.
Roger Ebert :  You like discovering cheese-and-fruit pairings.
Geekosystem :  You used to steal Reddit jokes for your Facebook feed, but your friends caught you.
Autoblog :  You use pomade.
Vulture :  You have theater tickets.
Stereogum :  You have a working definition of "authentic".
Brooklyn Vegan :  You have a working definition of "facon".
Videogum : You've openly scoffed at a celebrity in person.
Hipster Runoff :  Your friends squint at you a lot after you say things.
Consumerist :  You have some sort of fact sheet, like the Bill of Rights or some measurement conversions, in your wallet.
Cinematical :  You refuse to acknowledge that AOL shut this blog down. Jesus, live in the present.
TubeFilter :  You're surprised how much you say "content".
ReadWriteWeb :  You are the only person who actually called your representative about SOPA.
Art Fag City : You've fantasized about throwing poop onto something expensive that you actually like, just for the filthy thrill and the knowledge that this will make it worth more to someone foolish.
PostSecret :  You try so hard to act mysterious that everyone knows this about you.
I'm Remembering :  You own a stuffed animal.
The Frogman :  You can't listen to a Muppets song without singing along.
The Daily What : You like to borrow your friends' pets.
Slacktory :  You keep tripping over your own feet.

No comments: