Wednesday, November 28, 2007

34 Scripts and Ideas for Getting Back at Telemarketers

Flip the Script: 34 Scripts and Ideas for Getting Back at Telemarketers

Clever, effective and downright hilarious ways to smack down unwanted marketing calls.
By Inside CRM Editors on November 27, 2007

The Federal Trade Commission has just slapped Do Not Call Registry offenders with $7.7 million worth of penalties. With a figure like that, it's clear that telemarketers are finding that boundaries are a problem. But that doesn't mean you have to take their abuse — fight back using these 34 tools and tactics.

 

Ideas

Get guidance and suggestions for the best ways to get telemarketers off your back.

  1. Counterpitching: This Web designer suggests that you offer your services to the telemarketer on the other end of the line. Alternatively, you can also pretend to be in the business that they're selling from and make them feel silly for calling.
  2. Time to Fight Back: This article details ways to get back at telemarketers. You can waste their time, attempt conversational techniques and more.
  3. Do Not Call: Check out this list for ideas to use when called by a telemarketer. You'll find toilet humor as well as guilt tactics.
  4. How to Deal With Those Damn Telemarketers: Follow these tips when you get a telemarketing call. Some of the most important are: Don't just hang up, and make sure you say both "no" and "take me off of your list."
  5. Having Fun With Telemarketers: Here, you'll find 20 fun ideas for making telemarketers wish they'd never called you. Highlights include a marriage proposal and a few ways to waste their time.
  6. Anti-Telemarketing Action Kit: This guide from UCAN (Utility Consumers' Action Network) details ideas for keeping telemarketers at bay. You'll learn how to hurt them financially, waste their time and get payback.

Scripts

Telemarketers have them, why shouldn't you? Use these scripts to turn the tables on telemarketers.

  1. EGBG Counterscript: Download this counterscript as a PDF and use it the next time a telemarketer calls. It offers an excellent flowchart format with lots of options and rebuttals.
  2. Telemarketing Script: Use this list on telemarketers. It is full of questions that they are required, by law, to answer. If they call you again after this conversation, you can file against them.
  3. Junkbusters Anti-Telemarketing Script: This resource from Junkbusters has a fact-finding script that's useful for stopping calls and suing telemarketers that won't leave you alone. It even has a way to make them spend more time on you.
  4. Stop Junk Calls: With this script, you can make sure that telemarketers are aware of your rights and will put you on their "Do Not Call" list. The script is preceded by lots of helpful tips and guidelines for stopping telemarketing and slapping violators with the law.
  5. Anti-Telemarketing Script: Qualify telemarketing callers as potential lawsuits with this script of questions. Refusal to answer any of these questions can result in a fine.
  6. Fun With Telemarketers: This conversation with AT&T ended with a very frustrated telemarketer. The person behind the fun did it with lots of repetition, confusion about earning rates and making the agent go around in circles.

Inspiration

Check out these videos and recordings to see what others have done to get back at telemarketers.

  1. Telemarketer Phone Prank: This guy gives a telemarketer the runaround. He offers funny commentary as well.
  2. How to Prank a Telemarketer: On this site, you can listen to lots of hilarious telemarketing recordings that are sure to give you some great ideas. The most recent one was a prankster who told a telemarketer he was calling a murder scene and would need to be contacted for questioning.
  3. Choo Choo Telemarketer Prank Call: This payback prankster plays with a train whistle. The telemarketer doesn't get very far.
  4. Phone Losers of America: This collection of recordings has a number of telemarketing call pranks. The prankster claims to hate children, bargains with a caller for concert tickets and just plain acts like an idiot.
  5. How to Respond to a Telemarketer the Seinfeld Way: Jerry Seinfeld turns the tables on a telemarketer by asking for his home number. It's a simple but effective tactic.
  6. Burping at Telemarketers: Peter Coffin responds to telemarketers with gas. The telemarketer isn't quite sure how to handle it.
  7. How to Piss Off a Telemarketer: Chris Pirillo strings along a newspaper telemarketer by playing dumb about the company's Web site. She even claims their service is "better than Google."
  8. Top Ten Ways to Harass a Telemarketer: This video details 10 ways to string along a telemarketer. Some of the ideas include putting them on hold, speaking another language and requesting to call them back at home.

Legal Action

If you're really fed up, you can use the tactics outlined in these guides to hit telemarketers where it really hurts: their bank accounts.

  1. How to Make a Telemarketer Cry (or, Suing Bozos for Fun and Profit) : Follow this laywer's guided story to find out how you can get back at telemarketers through the legal system. You'll find detailed explanations of the law and a great list of resources.
  2. Suing Telemarketers Simple and Cheap: This guy has made more than $6,000 suing telemarketers with little monetary and time investment. Check out his collection of rules and guidelines to make it easy for you to get back at telemarketers in the same way.
  3. Suing a Telemarketer: How I Spent My Summer Vacation: Follow this teacher's guide to suing telemarketers. You'll also find alternatives to a lawsuit.
  4. Zen and the Art of Small Claims: Learn how to sue telemarketers in small-claims court with this 10-chapter guide. It covers everything from what you can sue for to collecting your reward.
  5. Report Prerecorder Junk Calls: Prerecorded telemarketing calls are not allowed, and the FCC (Federal Communications Commission) wants to know about these prohibited calls. Report them using this guide from Private Citizen Inc.
  6. Don't Let Them Off The Hook: Follow through with telemarketing violators using these tactics. This source includes a list of rebuttals to common lies companies will tell you to convince you that you don't have a case.
  7. How to Sue Telemarketers in Small-Claims Court: This guide from UCAN offers a step-by-step guide to hurting telemarketers where it really matters. It has a script, as well as tactics for controlling the call.
  8. Are You Taping This?: Find out if you can tape telemarketing calls in this resource. It lists states with one-party consent and two-party consent.

Technology

Get a little help fighting back against telemarketers with these tools and devices.

  1. Asterisk Telemarketer Torture: VoIP users can set up unusable menus that will torture telemarketers. This guide includes infinite loops, errors, cascaded menu choices, and lots more fun and torturous options that will amuse you and drive telemarketers crazy.
  2. Autodialer Jamming Call Tone: With this tone, you can jam telemarketers' autodialers used to determine the best call times. All you have to do is add it to your answering machine, and the calls should drop within a few weeks.
  3. Sorry Gotta Go.com: Visit Sorry Gotta Go.com to download MP3s that are sure to get telemarketers off the phone. Favorites include the microphone feedbck testing center and the Oscar Mayer jingle.
  4. Active Caller ID: With Active Caller ID, you can set up auto hang-up parameters. This feature includes the option to play hang-up messages like dialer jamming call tones.
  5. TeleZapper: Use the TeleZapper to protect your landline from computer-dialed calls. The device plugs into your phone jack and covers all of the phones, extensions and answering machines on the line it's connected to.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

Split seconds


Subject: Split seconds 

Between the seconds . . .with the click of a shutter sometimes we become privy to the strange world that occurs between the seconds



 

 

 

 


Saturday, November 24, 2007

MAC Keyboard Shortcuts

1 Cmd-C Copy files
2 Cmd-V Paste files
3 Option-Drag Copy files to new location
4 Cmd-Drag Move and auto-align icons
5 Cmd-Delete Delete
6 Cmd-Option-Drag Make alias
7 Cmd-Shift-Delete Empty trash
8 Cmd-Shift-Option-Delete Empty trash without warning
9 Tab Select next field
10 Shift-Tab Select previous field
11 Return Perform default action
12 Escape Close dialog box
13 Page Up Scroll up list
14 Up Arrow Select item above
15 Page Down Scroll down list
16 Down Arrow Select item below
17 Cmd-Shift-G Open 'Go to Folder' dialog
18 Cmd-Period[.] Close dialog box

Exposé, Space, Dashboard
and the System


19 F8 Toggle Space
20 Shift-F8 Toggle Space in slow motion
21 F9 Show all open windows
22 Shift-F9 Show all open windows in slow motion
23 F10 Show all open windows for an application
24 Shift-F10 Show all open windows for an application in slow motion
25 F11 Hide all windows
26 Shift-F11 Hide all windows in slow motion
27 F12 Open/close Dashboard
28 Shift-F12 Slowly open/close Dashboard
29 Option-Mouse Hover Reveal the close button of widget
30 Shift-Click Close Button Animate closing widget in slow motion
31 Cmd-H Hide application
32 Cmd-Option-H Hide other applications
33 Cmd-Q Quit application
34 Cmd-Shift-Q Quit all applications and log out
35 Cmd-Option-Shift-Q Log out without warning
36 Cmd-Tab Switch to next application
37 Cmd-Shift-Tab Switch to previous application
38 Option-Drag Adjust volume (on sound volume slider)
39 Cmd-Drag Arrange menu bar items
40 Option-Click Switch window and hide current window
41 Control-Click Open contextual menu
42 Cmd-Control-D See word definition (with mouse hover)

Issue: Freeze


43 Cmd-Period[.] Stop process
44 Cmd-Option-Escape Open Force Quit
45 Power Key Turn off
46 Cmd-Option-Shift-Power Key Force shut down
47 Cmd-Control-Power Key Force restart

Full Keyboard Access


48 Control-F1 Turn on/off full keyboard access
49 Control-F2 Focusing menu bar
50 Control-F3 Focusing Dock
51 Control-F4 Move to next window
52 Control-F5 Move to toolbar
53 Control-F6 Move to a floating window
54 Control-F7 Toggle keyboard access mode
55 Control-F8 Focusing status menu in menu bar
56 Cmd-Accent[`] Switch to next window within application
57 Cmd-Shift-Accent[`] Switch to previous window within application
58 Cmd-Option-Accent[`] Move to sidebar
59 Cmd-Option-T Toggle on/off character palette

Finder

60 Cmd-Click on Title See the path enclosing folders
61 Cmd-Double-Click (on folder) Open folder in new window
62 Option-Double-Click (on folder) Open folder in new window and close current window
63 Cmd-1 Switch to icon view
64 Cmd-2 Switch to list view
65 Cmd-Option-Right Arrow Expand folder
66 Left Arrow Close folder
67 Cmd-Down Arrow Open selected folder
68 Cmd-Option-Down Arrow Open selected folder in new window and close current folder
69 Cmd-Shift-Option-Down Arrow Open selected folder in new window and close current folder in slow motion
70 Cmd-Up Arrow Show enclosing folder
71 Cmd-Option-Up Arrow Show enclosing folder and close current folder
72 Cmd-3 Switch to column view
73 Cmd-4 Switch to coverflow view
74 Cmd-Y Toggle Quick Look mode
75 Cmd-Option-Y Toggle Slideshow mode
76 Cmd-Shift-H Open home folder
77 Cmd-Option-Shift-Up Arrow Move focus to Desktop
78 Cmd-Shift-I Open iDisk
79 Cmd-Shift-D Open Desktop
80 Cmd-Shift-C Open Computer area
81 Cmd-Shift-K Open Network
82 Cmd-Shift-A Open Applications
83 Double-Click on Title Minimize window
84 Cmd-M Minimize window
85 Option-Click on button Apply action to all windows in active application
86 Hold-Scroll Bar Scroll quickly

Search: Spotlight


87 Cmd-Spacebar Activate/deactivate Spotlight
88 Cmd-Option-Spacebar Open Spotlight window
89 Cmd-Return Open the top hit
90 Cmd-Down Arrow Move to next category
91 Cmd-Up Arrow Move to previous category
92 Cmd-Click Open selected item in Finder
93 Escape Close Spotlight

Utility: Print Screen


94 Cmd-Shift-3 Take snapshot of the whole screen
95 Cmd-Shift-4 Take snapshot of the selected area
96 Cmd-Shift-4-Spacebar Take picture of a window
97 Escape Cancel
98 Hold Spacebar after Drawing the region Move the selected area
99 Hold Option Resize selected area
100Hold Shift Resize selected area horizontally or vertically

Application: Dock


101 Drag the separator Resize Dock
102 Option-Drag Resize Dock to fixed size
103 Control-Click Show Dock's contextual menu
104 Control-Click on icon Show item's contextual menu
105 Cmd-Click Open the icon's enclosing folder
106 Option-Click Switch to another and hide current application
107 Cmd-Option-Click Switch to another application and hide all other applications
108 Cmd-Option-Drop Force application to open files
109 Cmd-Option-D Hide/unhide Dock

Preference: Universal Access


110 Cmd-Option-8 Turn zoom on/off
111 Cmd-Option-Equal[=] Zoom in
112 Control-Scroll Up Zoom in
113 Cmd-Option-Hyphen[-] Zoom out
114 Control-Scroll Down Zoom out
115 Cmd-Option-Control-8 Invert color (try this on those iMacs in Apple Store)
116 Control-Option-Cmd-Comma[,] Reduce contrast
117 Control-Option-Cmd-Period[.] Increase contrast
118 Cmd-F5 Toggle VoiceOver
119 Shift-Shift-Shift-Shift-Shift (5 times) Toggle Sticky Keys
120 Option-Option-Option-Option-Option (5 times) Toggle mouse keys

Boot: Start Up


These shortcuts only available during start up.

121 Shift Prevent automatic login
122 Shift Enter safe mode (hold down after startup tone and release after you see the progress indicator)
123 Shift Prevent opening Login Items (after login)
124 C Boot from CD
125 N Boot from default NetBook disk
126 T Start up in Target Disk Mode
127 Option Select startup disk
128 Cmd-X Start up using Mac OS X
129 Hold Mouse Button Eject removable discs
130 Cmd-Option-P-R Reset parameter RAM
131 Cmd-V Verbose mode (detailed status message)
132 Cmd-S Single user mode

Browser: Safari


133 Cmd-Option-F Move to Google Search Box
134 Option-Up Arrow Scroll Up
135 Option-Down Arrow Scroll Down
136 Cmd-Click Link Open in new tab and stay in current tab
137 Cmd-Shift-Click Link Open and go to new tab
138 Cmd-Option-Click Link Open in new window
139 Option-Click Close Button Close other tabs
140 Cmd-Shift-] Select next tab
141 Cmd-Shift-[ Select previous tab
142 Cmd-Shift-H Go to homepage
143 Cmd-Shift-K Toggle Block Pop-up Windows
144 Cmd-Option-E Empty Cache
145 Cmd-Option-R Reload page without Caching
146 Cmd-F Search term in webpage
147 Cmd-M Minimize Safari
148 Shift-Click Button Animate slow motion effect
149 Cmd-Plus[+] Increase font size
150 Cmd-Hyphen[-] Reduce font size
151 Cmd-0 Original font size

Music: iTunes


152 Return/Space Play
153 Option-Right Arrow Select next album
154 Option-Left Arrow Select previous album
155 Cmd-Right Arrow Play next song
156 Cmd-Left Arrow Play previous song
157 Option-Click on Shuffle Button Reshuffle
158 Cmd-Option-Down Arrow Mute
159 Cmd-E Eject CD
160 Cmd-T Turn on/off visualizer
161 Cmd-F Turn on/off full screen mode
162 Cmd-1 View iTunes window
163 Cmd-2 View equalizer mode

Terminal


164 Double-Click Select word
165 Triple-Click Select line
166 Drag item to Terminal Add the complete path to that item
167 Cmd-N Create new shell window
168 Cmd-Shift-N Enter new command
169 Cmd-Shift-K Connect to a server
170 Cmd-Option-S Save text
171 Cmd-Option-Shift-S Save selected text
172 Cmd-I Show terminal inspector
173 Cmd-T Create new tab
174 Control-C Break

Mail: Hello from Cupertino


175 Cmd-N New message
176 Cmd-Shift-N Get new mail
177 Cmd-Option-N Open new viewer window
178 Cmd-0 Open activity window
179 Cmd-Shift-Y Add senders to address book
180 Cmd-E Use selected text to find
181 Cmd-C while selecting message Copy entire text of a message
182 Cmd-Click on upper-right corner toolbar button Switch different toolbar display
183 Cmd-Single Quote['] Increase quote level
184 Cmd-Option-Single Quote['] Decrease quote level
185 Cmd-Shift-E Redirect message
186 Cmd-Shift-F Forward message
187 Hold Option when deleting message Prevent next message from being automatically marked as read
188 Cmd-Shift-R Reply to all
189 Cmd-Shift-B Bounce to sender
190 Cmd-Shift-T Convert message to rich text or plain text
191 Cmd-Left Brace[{] Align left
192 Cmd-Vertical Bar[|] Align center
193 Cmd-Right Brace[}] Align right
194 Cmd-Colon[:] Check spelling
195 Cmd-Semicolon[;] Flag misspelling of selected word

Front Row


196 Cmd-Esc Open/close Front Row or return to previous menu
197 Spacebar, Return Select item in a menu
198 Up Arrow, Down Arrow Change volume
199 Right Arrow, Left Arrow Go to next or previous selection

Address Book


200 Cmd-1 View card and columns
201 Cmd-2 View only card
202 Cmd-3 View directories
203 Cmd-Right Bracket[']'] Next card
204 Cmd-Left Bracker['['] Previous card
205 Cmd-Vertical Line[|] Merge selected cards
206 Cmd-Backslash[\] Set as company card

Image Editor: Adobe Photoshop


207 Cmd-Shift-M Edit in ImageReady
208 Cmd-Option-W Close all
209 Cmd-Option-S Save as
210 Cmd-Option-Shift-S Save for Web
211 Cmd-Option-Shift-I File info
212 Cmd-Option-P Print with Preview
213 Cmd-Option-Shift-P Print one copy
214 Cmd-Shift-F Fade
215 Cmd-Shift-C Copy merged
216 Cmd-Shift-V Paste into
217 Shift-F5 Fill with color
218 Cmd-Shift-T Transform Again
219 Cmd-Option-Shift-K Show keyboard shortcuts
220 Cmd-L Adjust levels
221 Cmd-M Adjust curves
222 Cmd-B Adjust color balance
223 Cmd-U Adjust hue/saturation
224 Cmd-Option-C Change canvas size
225 Cmd-Shift-N Create new layer
226 Cmd-J Layer via copy
227 Cmd-Shift-J Layer via cut
228 Cmd-Option-G Create/release clipping mask
229 Cmd-G Group layers
230 Cmd-Shift-E Merge visible
231 Cmd-Shift-I Select inverse
232 Cmd-Option-A Select all layers
233 Shift-F6 Select feather (Cmd-Option-D has been assigned to hide Dock)
234 Cmd-Option-V Filter vanishing point
235 Cmd-Plus[+] Zoom in
236 Cmd-0 Fit on screen
237 Cmd-Option-0 Display actual pixels
238 Cmd-Single Quote['] Show grid
239 Cmd-Semicolon[;] Show guides
240 Cmd-R Show rulers
Posted by webmaster

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Dollar Bill Tricks

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2398/1977925616_0a110513c8_o.jpg?the_old_title_sucked_so_reposting

Word Illusions

The next one is a really cool wedding card. When the card is closed, you'll see the name of the bride. When opened, the name of the groom will appear. Can you discover the names of the newly weds?

Names on a wedding card

This one is pretty strange. Just look at the words below. Doesn't make any sense, does it? Now sit back and try to read the text. The text will explain itself.

First and last only matter

What do you read here? Most people will read evil, but some will see the good in life at the first time.

Good or evil

Somewhat simular to the previous illusion. When you don't see the womans reflection in the mirror, you'll read hate. But when you see her reflection, you'll see her true self.

Hate or love

When looking at the following illusion, you'll probably read the word Life. But when you look closer, you'll see the characters are pretty messed up.

Life

Another double word illusion. Most people will see the word "Me" in brown directly. Only few will think about others the first time and see the other word.

Me and You

The following illusion looks like a couple of blocks don't doing anything. Can you see the words within these blocks? Try closing your eyes just a little bit, looking through your eyelashes.

No sex

This is a double word illusion that fits exactly in this topic. Which two words are spelled here?

Optical Illusion

Read the text in the triangle below out lout.

Paris Springtime

Did you read I love Paris in the springtime? If so, you're wrong. Look again and check what is really spelled.


In this illusion you'll read the word Teach and the reflection of it. Can you read the second word (the reflection) too?

Teach or Learn

The following four illusions show faces of people. The faces are created with words, showed both sides of the person. Can you see what person it is and which words they're spelled in?

Dead or Alive
Peace or War
Threat or Pretext
Tiranny or Freedom