Sunday, December 28, 2008

How to Use Your Digital Camera

It's Christmas, and we're betting that at least some of you received new digital cameras (be they point-and-shoots or DSLRs). And if you're a photography n00b, we've got a few tips to help.

Turn On Burst Mode
It's harder to capture candid shots on point-and-shoots (let's call em PASs) than DSLRs, but in either format you should turn on "burst mode" or "continuous shooting." This allows you to keep the camera taking shots as fast as it can by holding down the shutter button. Even the greatest photographers don't predict magical moments down to the millisecond—they let their camera do it for them. And with today's cheap and gigantic SD cards, you can afford to waste plenty of shots to get the best.

Control the Color Temperature Yourself
Auto White Balance (AWB) does a good job on most cameras. But you know who can do a better job? You. Backing up for a moment, since every color has its own relative "temperature" that's measured in degrees Kelvin, even the orangey glow of an incandescent bulb or the relatively bluish hue of the sun's light can screw with your photos. Your brain factors it out when you're looking around, but it's important to notice whether the light falling on your scene is more yellow or blue, and to compensate.
Your camera uses auto white balance to get around this cacophony of color, but it's not always right. On some cameras, you can actually use "manual white balance" (MWB), shooting a white patch, such as a piece of paper, in order to say "THIS IS WHITE." That's the most accurate way, though the simpler way found on most cameras is to manually select the best white balance by choosing the tiny icon that identifies your light source: a sun for direct sunlight, a cloud for cloudy, a round bulb for incandescent, a rectangular bulb for fluorescent, etc.

Keep ISO to 400 on PASs, 800-1600 on Low-End dSLRs
ISO, a carryover term from the days of film, essentially signals the sensitivity of the imaging sensor to light. A higher number means grainier (noisier) but better defined shots in low light; a lower number means smoother shots in decent light. Most cameras will crank this number in medium to low light situations so that it can capture a shot without blurring, but you will get a grainy image. This may just be a rule of thumb based on the cameras I've used, but for optimally crisp shots, don't let the ISO exceed 400 on your PAS or 1600 on your DSLR. (In some older DSLR models, you probably shouldn't exceed 800.)
Use Diffuse Flash, Or Just Turn it Off
Any way you cut it, flash is a problem. When used instead of ambient light, it pulls the color and texture from skin, turns eyes red (a phenomenon caused when the flash is too close to your lens, which it is in most cameras) and often erases the background ambiance from your shot. A few things you can do will help tame flash:
1. Check your manual for minimum and maximum flash distances—probably around 6 to 12 feet away—and stay in those constraints.
2. Diffuse the flash. A classic trick for DSLR owners is to put a cigarette carton on large flash attachments, but in the absence of a large flash—and a cigarette carton—try taping some kind of translucent paper over your flash.
3. Turn it off. Even a grainier high-ISO shot is better than a washed-out flash explosion. If you use a tripod, you can get nice low light shots without resorting to flash or upping the ISO. Most cameras now have a flashless "night mode" to automate this process.

Carry a Pocket Tripod
Ultimately, if you want to take good shots in dark environments, you need to allow light to hit your camera's imaging sensor for a longer period of time. And the only way to keep your shots sharp in this scenarios is to stabilize your camera. Though even cheap cameras boast image stabilizers of all kinds, a $7 pocket tripod trumps all that marketing speak, allowing you to use a solid surface to set up the camera and then angle it to your liking. If you don't have a tripod, try resting your camera on the side of a table, or up on a (preferably empty) water glass.

Protect Your Images From Lens Flare
In any situation where sunlight or some other bright light source is hitting your lens indirectly (not associated with your subject), you may lose part of your image to stray light. Sometimes this looks cool, of course, but not always. The best and most common solution is a lens hood. The second best solution (and the one that works for PASs) is your hand, a piece of paper, anything, between that light source and your lens.

Exhale, Then Shoot
ISOs and tripods aside, maybe the best tip I've ever gotten to taking great shots was to exhale, then take the picture. Right after you exhale, the tension is released from your body, and you'll find yourself, for a brief moment, at your stillest and most relaxed. In low light especially, it could be the difference between getting a clear shot and getting a blurry one.

Use Sepia Filter Whenever Humanly Possible
Sepia is well known for making your lousy photography "deep." Helllllooo precious moments! (OK, I sort of despise sepia because it's been so overused, but that's just me. It can be beautiful, of course.)
For DSLR Owners...Shoot in RAW, Shoot in RAW, Shoot in RAW
There are many advantages to the average DSLR camera, but the best, by far, unequivocally, is RAW shooting. If you save your pictures as JPEGs, they can be beautiful, but they've been compressed and packaged into a product. If you save in RAW, you have a picture, but you also have the cold clay that shaped it.
RAW is the data pulled right off the imaging sensor of your camera, before it gets run through a bunch of optimizer and compression algorithms. This data allows for a complete do-over on many aspects of the picture, like color temperature. In other cases, it allows a lot of room for fudging, as with exposure. You'll need software that can handle RAW images—most cameras come with something proprietary, but Photoshop can also manage RAW from the major camera brands. Just don't be scared by it. It's why you're holding that shiny new DSLR you have no idea how to use.

And Your Own...
I realize this list will seem too obvious to some, but the goal is to help those who didn't know much to start with. Since we have more than our share of incredible photographers among our readership, I'd encourage any of you with pro tips to please offer them up in comments.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

Manager Achieves Full Mastery Of Pointless Managerial Jargon

Manager Achieves Full Mastery Of Pointless Managerial Jargon

CHARLOTTE, NC—During what was described to them as "a look-forward meeting to discuss and evaluate the company's event-chain methodology," MediaLine employees stood with mouths agape Wednesday as they witnessed the very moment at which project manager James Atkins attained complete mastery over the fine art of meaningless corporate doublespeak.

Enlarge Image Project Manager

Project manager James Atkins has at last perfected his idle administrative blather.

According to his awed coworkers, Atkins' usage of vacuous administrative jargon reached an almost mythical apex with the pre-lunchtime announcement, during which a string of expertly crafted drivel rolled off the 28-year-old's tongue with the confidence of a seasoned executive.

"Due to the increased scope of the project vis-à-vis Tuesday's meeting, compounded with our aforementioned desire to maintain quality without increasing cost, an as-yet indeterminate amount of time will be allocated to our newest venture," Atkins said without once stuttering. "You should all be proud of the amount of effort and energy you have put forth thus far, and can be certain the project's conclusion will become more apparent as the tasks become increasingly more finite."

Atkins then told the stunned boardroom, "I look forward to partying with you all when the work is done," and concluded the meeting by saying he had to "step out." After they had regained their senses, his coworkers determined that this seemingly innocuous send-off was, in actuality, an attempt by Atkins to portray himself as a regular guy—a clever tactic that only further proved him to be a veritable wizard of ambiguous executive nonsense.

However, the magnitude of Atkins' achievement was only fully understood later, after employees finished sorting through the cloud of lilting bureaucratic bullshit that spewed forth from his mouth and deduced their project manager had just informed them that he had no idea when the new project would be completed, and no one would be receiving overtime pay.

"My God, just listen to him spin that empty administrative rhetoric into flaxen strands of gold," said a visibly stunned Tim Rosen, one of the company's head market researchers. "The fact that he could come in here and talk to us like that is…. Well, I'm speechless."

MediaLine president Brian Morrow was among the first to recognize Atkins for his newly achieved mastery of corporate gibberish. After years of directing Atkins to a large binder whenever he asked for tips on speaking with employees, Morrow said he knew his protégé had become a true virtuoso of business jargon when he witnessed Atkins enter the conference room with a newly acquired clipboard and ask a group of adults to participate in a "targeted brainstorm."

According to Morrow, Atkins is now closer than ever to receiving a promotion after confidently relaying the message that employees needed to "focus on diversifying the brand"— a masterful phrase of managerial gobbledygook devoid of any significant content that Morrow admits he himself doesn't fully understand and is unable to deliver convincingly.

"We are very impressed that James has made great strides to elaborate in this solution-oriented manner so as to more adequately harness heightened executive verbiage when such platitudes aren't necessarily mission critical," Morrow told reporters. "That's what we desire from those managers who are employed by, work for, touch base with, and attain biweekly compensation from, MediaLine. If he keeps up this outside-the-box thinking, and continues to focus on diversifying the brand, perhaps there could be a position opening up for him here at corporate."

When Atkins first joined MediaLine as a young market researcher in 2003, he was reportedly inept at using such inane administrative buzzwords and phrases. Sources close to him said he "spoke like a normal person" and wasn't even sure he wanted to enter the field of marketing. He only applied for the company's project manager position, colleagues said, because the increased salary would offer him a better chance to pay off college loans.

"When he first took the job two years ago, he told me, 'They're putting me in charge of making sure that stuff gets done,'" art assistant Kyle Bovard said. "That's why I was amazed when I overheard him on the phone yesterday describing his position as 'a facilitator tasked with developing predictable increments that are intricately tied to benchmarks, milestones, and completion dates.'"

"I don't know how somebody even begins to talk like that," Bovard added.

When asked to comment on his recent success, Atkins responded in a one-line e-mail, stating, "FYI ETA TBD EOM."